Because you’re worth it!

Do you remember a while ago I told you about the ‘Happiness Project’ they’re running at work?

http://msmuddles.blogspot.co.uk/2017/10/the-happiness-project.html

The most recent mini task is this:

Be kind to yourself

I’m sure you’ve seen this little phrase, floating around on mugs or on pastel-hued memes, in some form or other. Bit cheesy, bit wanky maybe but the idea behind it is sound. One of the ‘80s soul records my brother used to listen to would extort:

You can’t give love to no one else, until you learn to love yourself! (citation needed)

This is what we need to do, friends, in order to function well as a proper human being - love ourselves. Not easy though, is it.

I bore that in mind as I scooted around the supermarket yesterday (not literally, I have an unjust hatred towards adults on scooters). Usually the method I use to be ‘kind to myself’ is by eating copious amounts of chocolate (other sweet goods are welcome too, I’m not prejudiced) and indeed, Matchmakers were going half price so it seemed like kismet. But it led me to thinking, what other ways can you be kind to yourself? Some people; puritanical killjoys, health experts and ‘clean eaters’ would see excessive sugar consumption as an unhealthy way of looking after yourself, so what are the more esoteric, spiritual ways of feeling better?

Give yourself a break

Stop the negative self talk. Friends, I’ve had a cough and sore throat all week and am also suffering from a massive dose of existential angst. As I passed the mirror earlier it took a monumental effort to quieten my inner troll. After all, my jeans are tight and my hair is greasy and there’s only so much you can do with dry shampoo. I was about to launch into a full tirade of abuse then stopped; no, be kind to yourself. I said, inwardly and moved away from the mirror.

‘Step away from the mirror, ma'am, just put down the criticism and walk away!’

As women we’re supposed to be self-deprecating, it’s often perceived as a virtue. A friend of mine once defended right wing moron and uber troll, Katie Hopkins, by saying that Hopkins was quoted as saying ‘I know I look like a horse!’ So, in this person’s opinion, all can be forgiven because Hopkins puts herself down. She hates herself and thinks she’s ugly so she must be OK!  I reckon we’ve reached the crux of the problem here - the reason Hopkins is such a narrow-minded, heartless bully because she is so full of self-loathing. So, for goodness sake, let’s all not be like Katie Hopkins, let’s all give ourselves a massive pat on the back and if we can’t quite manage that, not slate ourselves. I’m just going to repeat the words of that ‘80s song:

You can’t give love to no one else, until you learn to love yourself! (citation needed)

Don’t expect perfection

Now that I’m a parent myself I can understand why my mum used to say that she wished that Christmas only came once every two years, because it’s bloody hard work. Organising costumes for Christmas plays*, remembering the money for the Christmas shop at school,  calls for volunteers at the Christmas bazaar, some kind of weird deal involving an orange (I’m a complete heathen), Secret Santa, cards, presents, food... (No wonder everyone gets pissed!)

*Children are often disappointed with things, it’s impossible to quite capture the strange, fairy tale image they have in their heads (or is that just my kids?). The Christmas costume that you've spent hours scouring the shops for, sewing sequins onto, washing and ironing at 3 in the morning, may never quite meet the bizarre image they have in their head of what a ‘funky’ star looks like, so you just have to rein in your ego,  train the little shits to say ‘thank you’ and teach them to sew, themselves!

So, I think we should take a collective vow not to expect the spoon-food, hazy advertiser’s concept of a perfect day and just - I don’t know, get shit-faced on Croft Original whilst enjoying Christmas dinner from a tin:

Postscript

Sometimes I look back on things I’ve posted and I think  - who am I to give advice? I’m frigging clueless. But I don’t see this as giving advice so much as - this is what I’m trying, I’ll let you know if it works...